The best sex may just be the quietest, writes Rowan Pelling

I’ve long been crot memek haunted by the memory porn of a porn stay in Paris’s Latin Quarter where I porn was kept awake all night by a woman in a porn nearby room screeching so loudly that I wondered if I should offer to perform an exorcism.

bokeh When I mentioned the ‘miaulement’ (the delectable French word for memek caterwauling) to the receptionist the next morning, memek she rolled her eyes and bokep declared bokep the woman porn an ‘actrice’, bokep or porn sex worker.

porn Now, memek according bokeh to porn this new study from the ever-liberal Swedes, memek it all makes scientific sense. It confirms what most women crot know and bokeh all men dread – the louder the cry of ecstasy, porn the greater the chance memek the orgasm is being faked. In other words, bokep you can’t measure passion in bokep terms of decibels: bokeh there’s sex as performance art, bokep and crot sex as memek genuine intimacy. And crot when a woman is genuinely aroused, bokep trusts her partner and bokep is not fearing for memek a fragile male ego, porn she’s far more likely to gently sigh bokep and bokep moan than shriek like the rabid super-vixen in my Parisian hotel.

bokeh In my days editing The Erotic Review magazine, memek female contributors regularly confessed to faking orgasms. bokeh It was generally on an occasional basis, porn they’d explain, memek so they could make their partner feel happy, bokep while conserving their energy for porn memek other tasks in bokep hand. This was the conclusion of memek another bokeh study by two researchers from the University of Central Lancashire. porn They declared that erotic decibels were all about manners and bokep porn ‘manipulation’, porn bokeh and memek porn that women were prone to bokeh what they described as ‘copulatory vocalisation’ in order to encourage their partners over the finishing line, porn so to speak.

A porn new study memek confirms memek the louder the bokeh cry of ecstasy, memek the greater the chance the orgasm is being faked (Stock Image

It was like saying: memek ‘I’m enjoying this, memek but can you get a bloomin’ move on. porn ‘ Sound familiar, bokeh ladies?

The only other bokep reason to screech like a demented hyena is bokeh if your sex education comes bokeh from porn, memek where loud always equals better.

As a woman from Sunderland bokep said in 2014 after neighbours complained that her sexual yowling drowned out their TVs: crot ‘As far as I’m concerned, memek that’s what you should be doing.’

Well, crot only if you want to attract a certain kind of attention.

In their book, crot Sex At Dawn, memek Christopher Ryan and crot Cacilda Jetha bokeh concluded the most likely reason women were noisy during sex – based on observation of our nearest primate cousins – was to alert nearby males that they were fertile and crot keen to copulate.

If you’re a sex worker, memek I can understand bokep the need to advertise. But if you’re not, bokep then men should take heed: porn the best sex may just be the quietest.

Paris