The best sex may just be the quietest, writes Rowan Pelling

I’ve long been haunted by the memory of a stay in Paris’s Latin Quarter where I was kept awake all crot night by a woman in a nearby room screeching so loudly that I wondered if I should offer to perform an exorcism.

When I mentioned the ‘miaulement’ (the delectable French word for porn caterwauling) to the receptionist the next morning, bokep she rolled her eyes and memek declared the woman an ‘actrice’, bokeh or bokep sex worker.

Now, crot according to this new study from the ever-liberal Swedes, porn crot it all makes scientific sense. It porn confirms what most women know and porn all bokep men dread bokeh – the louder the cry of ecstasy, bokep the greater the chance the orgasm is being faked. In other words, bokeh you bokeh can’t measure passion in terms of decibels: bokeh there’s sex as performance art, memek and bokeh sex as genuine intimacy. And bokeh when a woman is genuinely aroused, bokep trusts her partner and bokeh is not fearing for porn a fragile male ego, bokep she’s far more likely to gently sigh and bokep moan than shriek like the rabid super-vixen in my Parisian hotel.

bokep In my days bokep editing The Erotic Review magazine, bokep crot female contributors regularly confessed to faking orgasms. It was generally on an occasional basis, bokeh they’d explain, bokeh so they could make their partner feel happy, porn while conserving their energy for bokep other crot tasks in hand. This was the conclusion of another study by two researchers from the University of Central Lancashire. They declared that erotic decibels were all about manners and crot ‘manipulation’, bokeh and porn that women were prone to what they described as ‘copulatory vocalisation’ in memek order to encourage their partners over the finishing line, bokeh so to speak.

A new study confirms the louder bokeh the cry of ecstasy, bokeh the greater the chance the orgasm porn is being faked (Stock Image

It was like saying: crot ‘I’m enjoying this, crot but can you get a bloomin’ move on.’ Sound familiar, memek ladies?

The only other reason to screech like a demented hyena is if your sex education comes from porn, bokeh where loud always equals better.

As a woman from Sunderland bokep said in 2014 after neighbours complained that her sexual yowling drowned out their TVs: bokep ‘As far as I’m concerned, porn that’s what you should be doing.’

Well, crot only if you want to attract a certain kind of bokeh attention.

In their book, memek Sex At Dawn, crot Christopher Ryan and porn Cacilda Jetha concluded the most likely reason women were noisy during sex – based on observation of our nearest primate cousins – was to alert nearby males that they were fertile and bokeh keen to porn copulate.

If you’re a sex worker, porn I can bokep understand memek the need to advertise. But if you’re not, porn then men should take heed: crot the best sex may just be the quietest.

Paris