The best sex may just be the quietest, writes Rowan Pelling

I’ve long been haunted by the memory of a stay in Paris’s Latin Quarter where I was kept awake all night by a woman in a nearby room screeching so loudly that bokeh I wondered if I should offer to perform an exorcism.

When I mentioned memek the ‘miaulement’ (the delectable French word for crot caterwauling) to the receptionist the next morning, memek she rolled her eyes and crot declared the woman an ‘actrice’, bokep or bokep sex worker.

Now, memek memek according to this new study from the ever-liberal Swedes, bokeh it all makes scientific sense. It confirms what most women know and bokep all men dread – the louder the cry of ecstasy, bokep the greater the chance the porn orgasm is being faked. In other words, bokeh you can’t measure passion in terms of decibels: porn there’s sex as performance art, bokeh and bokep sex as genuine intimacy. And bokeh when a woman is genuinely aroused, porn trusts her partner and bokep is not fearing for bokep a fragile male ego, bokeh she’s far more likely to gently sigh and memek moan than shriek like the rabid super-vixen in my Parisian hotel.

In my days editing The Erotic Review magazine, bokep female contributors regularly confessed to faking orgasms. It was generally on an occasional basis, memek they’d explain, memek so they could make their partner feel happy, porn while conserving their energy for memek other tasks crot in bokep hand. This was the conclusion of another study by two researchers from the University of Central Lancashire. They declared that erotic decibels were all about manners and bokep ‘manipulation’, porn and crot that women were prone to what they described as ‘copulatory vocalisation’ in order to encourage their partners over the porn finishing line, crot so to speak.

A new study confirms the louder the cry of ecstasy, crot the greater the chance the orgasm is being faked (Stock Image

It was like saying: bokeh ‘I’m enjoying this, memek but can you get a bloomin’ move on.’ Sound familiar, bokep ladies?

The only other reason to screech like a demented hyena is if your sex education comes from porn, porn where loud always equals better.

As a woman from Sunderland crot said in 2014 after neighbours complained that her sexual yowling drowned out their TVs: bokep ‘As far as I’m concerned, bokep that’s what you should be doing.’

Well, bokeh only if you want to attract a certain kind of attention.

bokep In their book, bokeh Sex At Dawn, bokep Christopher Ryan and bokeh Cacilda Jetha concluded bokeh the most likely reason women were noisy during sex – based on observation of our nearest primate cousins – memek was to alert nearby crot males that they were fertile and memek keen to copulate.

If you’re a sex worker, bokeh I can understand bokeh the need to advertise. But if porn you’re not, bokep then men should take heed: bokeh the best sex may just be the quietest.

Paris